Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Seriously, I need to snap out of it...

My life is good. I have a husband that is just awesome in every way- he makes me laugh, is smart, quite cute and the best father. I have a great daughter- like really scary good. My family is close to me and provides me nothing but support. Oh, and there is the whole survived cancer thing. See my life is good.

So why do I just focus on the negative? Lately, I am completely focused on the cancer coming back and can't seem to shake the fear. Going through it last year, I don't remember having this fear and now if I feel any twinge of pain anywhere I automatically assume it is the big C. It is annoying. Not just for me but for the great family I previously talked about.

This whole beating myself up was only made worse yesterday when I had my cholesterol checked. My good cholesterol is too low- why because I am fat and lazy. Ok the dude didn't exactly use those words but basically because I am overweight and don't exercise, I have low good cholesterol. Also if I lose weight and exercise I would have a lower chance of cancer coming back. All signs point to working out and eating well.....and I don't. Well not consistently.

It is simple- I just need to do it. I focused on beating cancer and it worked, now I just need to focus on being healthy. So that is my focus. I have lost 15 pounds this year and just need to keep going. I am trying to give myself a pep talk here....Maybe it will work.

6 comments:

Harini said...

Michele, you can do it! Losing weight is nothing compared to all the things you have done this year :)

Michelle Hutchinson said...

You have a high profile job at a big company that is all over the news, I'm sure there's no ounce of laziness there, you have a long commute, you are an amazing wife, mother, daughter, sister and friend and you've lost 15 lbs in 3 months. All of this after having beat cancer less than a year ago. No laziness in any of that. You should feel awesome about all the things you've done and continue to do. You are healthy and going to stay healthy. As the weather warms up you will be outside more, gardening and chasing your little toddler all over which is the best thing there is for the heart, soul and body.

Anonymous said...

Go go go! You can do it!

(Nothing we say will make a difference... until it does!)

I tried this today and it was lots of fun: http://www.zumba.com/us/about/

Here's classes near you: http://7191.zumba.com/

carmen zoraida said...

Michele, this supporting family that you talk about wants you to live while you are on this earth, make mistakes, be lazy, be boring, be funny, be happy, be sad, be avaricious, be generous,be whatever it is that at that moment makes you vibrate. We do not want you to judge yourself so harshly because we love you and accept you as you are. You pamper yourself and be healthy for yourself and teach us to do the same with ourselves.

Grandma and Grandpa said...

MICHELE, To our HEALTHY special gal who lives in A/A. PK & I read these blogs, And I have to say you don't have time to think about the NEGITIVE. Weight on women is EASY to attach and harder than HELL to get rid of. Since last Oct. after PK's gall blader removal,she has been on a LOSE weight get healthy kick. YES we have more time to devote per day,than your BUSY day, on exercise. Start small , WALK , WATER, WATER, LOW, LOW carbs. You know where Iam coming from. I know you have the WILL POWER to do it. You have it all. PK just finished ALL the test CT,Blood work, etc. ALL CLEAR. Its been almost 3 years. Go GIRL. Last and final the LELAND house this summer. We are getting many requests.We love you guys. I miss the cookies. Love the DR.

Grandma and Grandpa said...

Sorry it said Grandma and Grandpa but that is the way it goes to Krista's Blog. Have a great Easter and I hope the bunny brings a lot of goodies.

Phyllis